Yesterday, Apple had one of its events which makes you spend the next few hours madly adjusting your spending expectations for the year. There, they announced the Apple Pencil. 
It's a neat little thing, but it's also a total stylus with a fancy name and a $100 price tag. 
So, the Internet had at it. 
APPLE PENCIL OMG WHAT THE HECK I AM DEAD pic.twitter.com/2MMi0C5ErM
— Justine Ezarik (@ijustine) September 9, 2015I hope the next version is called the Apple No.2 Pencil.
— Ben Parr (@benparr) September 9, 2015Apple Pencil gets laughs in a room of people specifically chosen not to laugh at dumb names of things.
— Jeff Cannata (@jeffcannata) September 9, 20152014: bigger phones!
2015: apple pencil
2016: apple fax machine
2017: apple pager
2018: apple abacus
https://t.co/LLJe2QWSWv
— arit john (@aritbenie) September 9, 2015
There were also a lot of the jokes you would completely expect, but still welcome. 
kid - can I get the new Apple pencil? 
parents - sure here u go pic.twitter.com/nNZ0nUBlUW
— Jenny (@xojennydey) September 9, 2015Hate to brag, but i am the first person to get my hands on the new #Apple #Pencil pic.twitter.com/LfaekHlfWh
— Daddy (@LifeisSavage) September 9, 2015
And then there was the Apple Pencil Pro:
But the troll of all trolls came from America's diner and weird Twitter participant — Denny's.
introducing denny's toothpick. 
your teeth, performing at full potential. pic.twitter.com/a8uxWmAwXF
— Denny's (@DennysDiner) September 9, 2015